“I have children!” “I work long hours.” “I am tired when I get home.” “I never see my friends.” “I,” – stop. Stop right there. These—are excuses. And although they are all extremely valid, they are still just that, an excuse.
If you were low on cash, and lets face it, you are. You would find the crappiest job known to mankind in order to fulfill that need. If you needed more, maybe you would rob a bank, and lord knows if that didn’t do it, you might find yourself stripping down for a few extra bucks. Trust me, I tried it. But, they threw me out.
Yeah, you’re broke. But time is money and we are going to have you finding so much of it, that you might need to pay me by the end of this. Or not.
Since you asked, I do take donations you benevolent soul you.
Bring your laptop, notebook, or typewriter with you. (If such a thing is possible)
This is a no brainer, but when the greatest best-seller idea of all time magically pops into your skull, please for the love of all that is holy, write, it, down! With that said, the added mobility of having your laptop at your disposal 24/7 will mean that whenever the moment arises – you know, when your boss isn’t looking. Then you can get some quality writing time in.
If you happen to be a straight-laced, play-by-the-rules kind of guy, or gal, then I suppose you can wait for your lunch break. But isn’t life more exciting when you live on the edge?
Take public transportation
Disclaimer: If you work more than two hours away from your home, then you are out of luck. Otherwise, I highly recommend catching the bus, or the ferry, depending on your location. Although this may seem like a paradox, the time it takes you to drive to and from work is time that you are busy concentrating on traffic and well, not dying. Catching the bus is a passive activity; you can sit back plug in your earphones and get into the writer’s zone. In fact, if you are struggling to write an hour a day I highly recommend catching the bus and you will instantly get that hour, plus there’s the added bonus of saving money on gas. Look at that, I just saved you time and money, where’s my cut?
Thinking is key
Turns out you live far away from work and you refuse to bring your laptop with you because you are blatantly trying to ignore my advice. There’s still an option for you, you bum. Thinking. Yes, thinking.
Whether you are at work, whether you are busy with your children, whether you are trying to evade your husband’s/boyfriend’s/sidepiece’s advances. You are always thinking. Sure you might appear as vacuous as the solar system, but that doesn’t mean that there’s not a lot of action going on inside that cranium. So choose your thoughts wisely. That’s right, I’m talking to you guys on instagram looking at hellacious pictures of women—myself included.
Dive into a sea of thought, hone in and focus on your novel. Let the voices of your characters be your shipwright as they move you closer to your goal. Build depth to those voices and create wonderfully crafted scenes. Soon you will have an entire chapter inside your mind just waiting to burst onto the pages.
The mind is an exceptionally powerful tool. Use it effectively and move past the limitations of time. You can accomplish endless amounts of work in there, especially if you utilize my earlier points and jot those fantastically brilliant thoughts down. Or you can turn the clock back an hour and pretend like its daylight savings time, don’t worry, work won’t mind.
Take bathroom breaks at work! While you’re at it, download an appropriate note application on your phone. This way while your on the can, or merely pretending to cast a diabolical stench, you can write down some great material or bust through that terrible case of writer’s block.
If all else fails, get off of your butt and sacrifice a bit of sleep. You don’t need those recommended 8 hours of sleep anyway. Stay up an extra hour to get the work done that you wanted to complete. Trust me, you will sleep better knowing you did. It’s a bit harsh, but it’s your fault in the first place for not listening to me.
In short – coffee, you’re going to need a lot of coffee. Or Cwoffe if you’re from Boston…I’m sorry.
No I’m not.