I get it, you’re a blogging all-star, you got your game on, go play. Hey now, you’re a rock star, get the show on, get paid! But the thing is, all that glitters isn’t always gold, you’re not the only shooting star, and you certainly didn’t break the moow-ooold.
You know what that means? Its time to promote your blog.
By now, you are smart enough to realize that your website is going to go nowhere fast, especially if you don’t promote the hell out of this thing like the world’s best used car salesman. That’s right, if you rest on your laurels and wait for lottery game of, “going viral” you might as well set your posts to private. (nothing wrong with that by the way).
Otherwise, pray to the WordPress gods, sacrifice your first-born on the altar of the omnipotent “reader” and hope that your offering suffices, or you could simply go read my post on why no one is reading your blog. I’ve heard that its helped trillions – somehow.
Now, I’m not under any delusions that my blog has more than two readers and neither should you. The good news is, one day we will have a stadium full of people chanting our name, but for now I’ll settle for an empty stadium with a few drunk guys who got lost. I can work with that.
Every rock star starts out in an empty stadium. (Promote your blog by foot)
Right now, you are a grassroots band. That means that essentially you only get playtime in those festivals where everyone and everything is high. What this also means, is that you need to really sell your soul for rock and roll if anyone is going to hear the sweet music you make. This means the usual suspects; Facebook, twitter, reddit, Instagram, a whopping side of SEO and the enigma that is pintrest.
If you are going to promote your blog, you will have to do much if not all of the footwork, mainly because no one knows who the hell you are. So, get a nice comfortable pair of shoes and walk it out. You know those poor souls that have to sell random contraptions and go door to door to barely make ends meet? Yeah, that’s you right now. You need to put in a lot of work, sharing, liking, engaging, commenting, maybe even party favors if that’s your thing. Show a little leg, I don’t care.

Better Call Saul.
Putting up posters (Promote your blog through Blogger engagement)
You don’t have an epic front man to promote your blog like Drake or Jay-z, instead your going to have to be like Peter Parker during the day time delivering pizzas door to door. Every engagement is crucial, in fact you could say that blogging engagement is like a relationship…
This is the moment of truth, the moment where you become the best version of yourself. And when I say “best version” I mean, finally employing those used car salesman tactics I mentioned earlier.
That’s right, you are going to take it into overdrive and engage, engage, engage. When you engage with other bloggers you show up on their radar and appear suddenly, like you just took off the one ring.
Whilst these engagements might not seem important at first, over months and years of engaging with other bloggers you will attain a following of genuine people and that core base is essential, until you become famous of course.

No one showed up, but we still rocked.
The first gig
This is your first decent post, you know, the one where someone actually decides to put you out of your misery and click “like.” Hell, they might even comment if they are feeling particularly benevolent. Like most bloggers, you are over the moon with joy and hopefully use this comment to bolster a blogging career like none other.
When these kind creatures who clearly feel sorry for you decide to click, comment and (even more unlikely) re-blog, you should respond with the utmost grace and fervor, even if such a thing doesn’t exist. I say this because, it may never happen again.
Of course, I jest, (partially) but remember these people, give them shout outs and link their profiles, a massive part of promoting your blog is actually retention, don’t lose the readers you already have, especially if you only have two like me. I can’t lose one, then I’ll only have a “read-er.” Doesn’t quite have the same ring to it.

I speak in noises.
Record Deal (Promote your blog through guest posts)
So, for some reason, you got signed. Some daft blogger liked your post so much that they decided they wanted you to guest blog on their site, the catch is they have 20k followers and for the first time in history more than two eyes will be on your blog.
These people are the gate-keepers, the blogging superstars, the avengers if you will. So, if there’s anyone’s feet you should be kissing (but seriously don’t because that’s disgusting) it should be them.
Aside from witchcraft and a lot of begging, the only way this is going to happen is by writing quality content and focusing on your voice. If you look at your blog as a product, think carefully, would someone buy it? Make sure your home page is attractive and lends people into wanting to read further and maybe if your lucky, someone who can really make seismic shifts happen will discover your blog. (Still waiting over here)
Pay attention, sometimes big entities are looking for guest posts or full-time guest writers, this is your chance to shine!!! Magazines and other big websites constantly look for writers to help them write content, this can help you promote your blog and exponentially increase your exposure. This should be very exciting, but it’s always good to remember that you are writing to an audience that has never seen your work before, so make it good.
No pressure.

please remember us.
One hit wonder
My dear lord you just went viral, you’re not sure how, definitely not sure why, but who cares, you made it baby. Now its time to parlay that post into something—more, more followers, more loyal fans and if you’re into it – money. (Then again, who am I kidding. We’re all broke)
This beautiful shining post that you made, the one that will surely bolster you into fame and glory, needs to be shared with the entire planet earth. If you could devise a virus that could infiltrate every orifice, every computer, phone and network with your post, hell – do it. In fact, I’ll help you do it. I don’t mind getting my paws dirty.
Congratulations, you’ve just joined the “how I did this club.” You too can go onto Pintrest and add pins like “How I got 1 million followers” or “how I made a million dollars suddenly.” I’m happy for you I really am, but remember, the most important thing you need to do when you go viral (and this is integral to your success) is to make sure and link my website to that post.

Rip Chester, Linkin Park for life.
Sophomore Slump
Already?
Yeah, that’s right, you finally wrote something decent and it went viral, now what?
The unfortunate thing about that killer album you wrote, is that you will never reach the pinnacle again. Try as you might, you will only be met with words of disapproval. “You sold out.” “You used to be so great.” “How did you make hybrid theory and then make minutes to midnight?” (RIP Chester)
Its tough being the unicorn or even worse – chasing one. That’s why I write absolute drivel, at least that way I can aspire to something one day.

James Hetfield looking like a Lion in the 80’s. I wasn’t born yet, otherwise I would have been the only baby there.
Headliners – Promote your blog to a target audience by advertising
If you’re anything like me, advertisements sound way too expensive and completely unnecessary. However, to bigger bloggers who truly know their audience it can be quite effective. If you have dialed into and honed your niche, you should have a very specific audience that you currently write to. But, like any rockstar you want to have more exposure and that means playing for a bigger audience, bigger tours…. Metallica.
So, whilst advertising can be cumbersome and cost you some pretty bitcoin, it can help gain you that highly coveted exposure you have been craving. Or not, maybe you’re like me and just write what you want to write and hope to god people enjoy it.
But then again, you’re a blogging rock star, I’m just a nerdy lion.
Non-Important message: I hear the re-blog button has been purportedly broken due to so many of you hitting it for the sake of my blog. Please continue to do so, in fact – do it twice just to make sure its working properly. Thanks.
I’m sending social services out there for Simbalina, when she’s born. You might as well dub me godmother now
lol I trust you to raise my cub, I think.
I have no idea what you mean by any of this. Maybe I’m too old to understand it. https://wordpress.com/post/solomonsadvisor.wordpress.com/5683
Some of us just have to accept that only 10 people at most, are interested in our content! 🙂
Very true, I’m still working up to that number haha. Its all about what you’re in it for, I just love writing and people enjoy it, as long as your happy that’s the main thing.
Absolutely! Second you on this!
😂😂 I love how you jest all the while with first the “2 readers” and then “read-er.” Till the end, a great one!
lol, its a running joke I use now haha.
This is great advice. I have done most of the things you mention, or am currently still doing those. My traffic is picking up so it does work. Thanks for the message
Thanks for reading
The only way I will ever go viral is as patient zero in some weird plague.
Haha, same. That would be some accomplishment! The beginning of the zombie apocalypse.
Great post with some wonderful advice. I like your unique way of writing, it’s refreshing.
I love the way you write, it’s like a conversation, only its just you talking (more of a listener myself anyway).
Loved the post!
Yeah this is essentially what my mind sounds like lol. I think it’s easier to explain things in this writing style so I adapted it. 🙂 thanks for reading another post!
A lot of great references that hit home for me. I guess it time to go on tour. All while trying not to turn into a one hit wonder. Wish me luck!
You got This! You’re going to have a great career!
Thank you. I really appreciate those kind words. 🙏🏾
Thanks for these tips. Like George Burns in Oh God! , I need all the help I can get.
Haha, I love it.
This makes me think of the viral mashup guy in Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. Like, he was briefly famous then once forgotten became a wise fount of wisdom to the newly viral (Titus). Which, judging from the often brutal internet treatment of the very famous, actually seems preferable. No worries here, though, I reckon I’m far too verbose for viralhood! Though I am very happy to have my healthy roomful of readers. Akin to the small group gathered around the snack table at a party, perhaps.
I enjoy your posts 🙂
I’ve been meaning to watch the new season. That show is hilarious. I’m sure a ton of people enjoy your verbosity. I enjoy big words myself as long as they make sense when put together. Like a sandwich for instance. Thanks for reading 🙂 “unbreakable” 🎵
I love your stuff, Nerdy.
I ❤ you lola
Very accurate! I literally constantly like and comment on others’ posts bc I know you have to put in work to see results.
Yeah it’s literally a part time job of mine. Plus it’s great for other bloggers too. I try to comment on at least 5-10 posts minimum. 🙂 so thanks for coming over to comment on mine 🙂
As always, keeping me entertained and making things relatable! Love all your references! Get Schwifty, one of my fav Rick & Morty song creations. Sugar Ray, please remember us? hahah Poor guys are always forgotten, all the things that they used to know have gone out the window!
Love your tips and information as it is definitely helping me get an idea of what I want to do with my blog 🙂
Love it Leo! Maybe that’s another factor, my star sign is Leo so I was automatically drawn to your blog and then you kept me hooked with your content! Cheeky feline you!
Hehe 🙂 thanks for being such an awesome person and reading my post :). You’re the best. Yeah Sugar Ray are really forgotten. The lead singer is on big brother. I was like, “oh he was in a band.”
Aww shucks! 😄 I read what I like and normally I’m not a reader haha
Probably everyone’s reaction right there haha 😂
❤
Always a good read. Don’t think I’ll ever gets a lot of followers–I only post once a week–so I’m happy with a like or two.
🙂 once a week is the best!
I really enjoyed your post! You offer some relevant advice in an understandable goal. That is what I want to do also. Please check out my blog, maybe we can connect sometime!
Intetesting post. And didn’t miss the humour too. I am in this kinda run now. I am relatively new to blogging.
I am just 3 posts old and working on a series as of now. Would be please if you visit my blog.
Love this. I just hit 200 likes from 13 months of blogging. So nothing vital for me. Just enjoying the ride and the folks I meet along the way x
Viral 😄
This is great advice and I love your humour 🙂
Thanks dear 🙂
https://theemunyakigezi.wordpress.com
Glad to find you! I’ll be reading 🙂
<3
Hey Leo! I was wondering if you could help me with something. I write articles along with a group of friends and we put a lot of time and effort into them to make sure that they are all to a high standard. We also share all our content to relevent groups on social media and have done our best to get all the tags and images just right. We are even getting a fair number of views for a new site.
Our issue is that none of the people who view our site are following… Do you have any advice? We do top 10 articles about a variety of topics and are not completely new to blogging having managed to get 100 followers in a week using a different niche. The site is http://www.theapexlist.wordpress.com
The biggest thing is engagement, there’s definetly an audience for what you are trying to do, so reach out to people who you think would like that sort of thing and I would target people who post in the same “tags” that you have in each article. WordPress is a great place for blogger engagement, probably the best. Other than that Facebook among other social media outlets can help for exposure to your website as well. 🙂
Wonderful advice and I really love the tittle 😁😁
Thanks for reading! Im happy you liked it.
Your welcome 😊
Hi Leo. I realized you liked a post on my page so naturally I decided to check out your blog. And this post was really amazing. An eye opener if you will. It inspired to write a new post which I’ll probably have up in a day or two. Thanks for the inspiration ❤
Thanks Chocolate, Ill definetly have to check out that new post! 🙂
Hi again. Here’s the link to the post you inspired me to write. https://chocolatevybz.wordpress.com/2018/03/02/i-got-inspired-an-mpo/ I hope you like
“Aside from witchcraft and a lot of begging, the only way this is going to happen is by writing quality content and focusing on your voice. ”
Oh, man… This cracked me up. Good laughs with some awesome advice thrown in! Thank you for keeping things whimsical, Leo!
– Laura
https://theordinarylovestory.com
“Aside from witchcraft and a lot of begging, the only way this is going to happen is by writing quality content and focusing on your voice. ”
This cracked me up. I had a good laugh with some awesome advice thrown in! Thank you for keeping things whimsical, Leo!
https://theordinarylovestory.com
Thanks for stopping by my blog 🙂 I always try to insert a little humor 🙂
Thank you for liking my post. I just decided to check your posts and I am happy I did. I am new to the blogging community. My passion for writing and helping people led to the creation of my blog. I write stuffs that promote healthy and loving relationships on my blog. Visit my blog everyday for interesting and enlightening write up on relationship http://www.seyilovedoctor.wordpress.com
Awesome! I will visit 🙂 thanks for reading.
👍thanks for sharing your ideas..
❤your blog..
Sending positive vibes 🌸
Thanks sweetheart <3 positive vibes received!
Hey ! Please check out my blog I am quite proud of my coping with failure post but it did not get many views ! Any constructive criticism is warmly welcomed ! https://meowskies13.wordpress.com/
Loved the giggle-inducing bit when you said a few drunken guys walked in, lost!
You’ve defo earnt the follower numbers you have … you write so so well!
Hey! I just wanted to let you know that I nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award!
https://anxiouschristianduringanxioustimes.wordpress.com/2018/04/02/versatile-blogger-award/
I really enjoy your blog, especially the photos!
❤️ Kay.
Wow, thank you 🙂
No problem!
Lmao this title made me crack up.Keep up the good work,this was really helpful.I aspire to have a blog ad big as yours one day.Lots of love,keep blogging<3
Thanks dear 🙂
This was so helpful! Thank you!
Im happy you enjoyed it 🙂
As I just said on why noones reading your blog post… great writing style 👍
Mike
[…] How To Promote Your Blog Like Its Going On Tour […]
Blogging is alot of work so I appreciate you posting this. This is beneficial
A wonderfully witty and imaginative way to present some brilliant advice! Much appreciated 🙂
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